here

thursday: arriving home amidst the freezing ass and windy expanse of the surrounding evening, i entered my humble abode upon a most blessed sight/sound/smell. a warm and toasty dining/living/kitchen (if you've seen the house you know) area. a wife in her jammies spinning a little chet atkins and putting a kettle on. a few oatmeal cookie smelling candles, and a freshly cracked beatles puzzle awaiting our fiddling fingers. being married.

friday: i worked until eleven. then met up with mikey and put a whole bunch of the family guy on the ol' ipod. "P..., tear, griffen. P tear griffen. Peter Griffen, Damnit!" acually i think it's, "Ah Crap!"

saturday: amber's working on the slopes by 8 am. trooper. dead beat hus slept in to around ten. sat in bed and watched family guy to around eleven. shaved some handlebars. went to bj's sandwich shop for a patty melt and two budweisers. suns out. went to lumber yard, loaded up squareback with stacking stone and spent the rest of the afternoon landscaping the back yard. so that was pretty much man day. i guess, until i pulled into the lumber yard where a bunch of lumber yard type flanel wearin' men stared me down in the cute little yellow car i was in. that night we grabbed a pizza, a six pack, and sixteen episodes of lost. then we grabbed a little bit of each other.

sunday: attended a mostly akward (dry) wedding reception in san diego. on the way home we stopped by the real b.j.'s where sean (now nic'named mentone) proceeded to turn 21 in proper form. had a couple j. reds, discussed plans to fly to nashville, then made friends with a homie/gangster who bought me a bloody mary. i love making friends with gangsters. i absolutely love it!

so here i am again writing about what i did. why do i do this. who the hell cares? nobody.
anyway, tonight josh and i will play some music, then it's time to get serious. amber and i have got a lot of lost to watch. i hope everyone is well.

postscript: customer service is a suck ass thing. i hate bitches.

here

tim- "are all these questions going to be about war?"

gareth- "no i've got loads of ques-, i've got some on tennis, one on the suez canal, loads."

gareth still- "right. next, name the body of water connecting the red sea and mediterranean sea."

just a few random facts about chuck norris as i sit at work and hang ten the web over my stouffer's lean cuisine three cheese chicken and broccoli with red peppers. no preservatives.

fact #1: chuck norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. chuck norris goes killing.

fact #2: chuck norris counted to infinity twice.

fact #3: chuck norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. shortly after the transaction was finalized, chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. the devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming.

ohhh man.

does anyone remember that kid "verno" from "stand by me" who always said, "sincerely!" and also brought a comb even though he had no hair?
thinking of the chuck norris days made me think of that.

i'm bored.

spent two days in silverlake

where i/we:

slept on becca's wood floor.
was/were inebriated four times.
raced my wife to ralphs for more beer.
made new international friends at a red lion:
-a german who hated america pre living here.
-a russian who hugged me and sang to me.
-a native american who tamed a stallion.
-a lithuanian who spake japanese.
ate at a backdoor bakery.
yodeled along to 'focus' with some pattersons.
quoted christmas vacation in it's entirety.
talked with a longshoe and wife and dog.
reacted allergically to shellfish or saki.
took two benodryl and went to cha cha's.
fellowshiped with lutherans in pasadena.
made and ate baklava c/o a shant and jen.
listened to art bell.
was/were home by sunday midnight.

dumb lists.
i can't stop.
things to do this week:

tune and play guitar.
tune and play ukulele.
pick up tune and play piano. not gonna happen.
start puzzle with wife.
rent the weather man with wife.
make dinner for wife.
up and drive to vegas. hopefully soon rose.

question:

if you could change your name, what would you go with?

i'd go with either emmett, lyle, or rocky.

click this'n here

please do yourself a favor and take a gander at this.

be mine until the end of lunchtime

i remember when i was in or around the fourth grade, it wasn't un-heard of to have three or four different girlfriends in one day. sometimes two at a time, and i was just thinking to myself, "man thats kinda sleazy"
with that thought; i was at the market last night. amber's been under the weather, and i was in line with some chicken noodle and some saltines gazing over the magazine racks when i birthed a concept: hollywood love is very much like that of an elemantary school. that and, how the crap does bat-boy gain three hundred pounds in two weeks? but all these glistening sex symbols that line the covers of "us" magazine and what not are douche bags. it's a formula, become an actor, become a douche bag. however the one difference between l.a. and school, for me at least, was the guilty party. the males weren't doing the dumping, at least in my case. i was doing the getting dumped. apparently i was tight, as opposed to being loose. what are you going to do?
dylan said it best, "all I really want to do is baby be friends with you (cause your tight)." i think that's what he meant.

i am a ninja turtle

i can't stop. every morning i tell myself that this day is going to be different, and inevitably i do it again. i generally don't eat breakfast, unless matt and i go out or we have friends up or something. so in a given week i'll eat 14 meals. out of those 14 i would say that at least 10 are pizza. lunch time will roll around and i may have planned all day to get a sandwich, but suddenly i find myself dialing the number to maggios and ordering a couple of slices of cheese pizza to go. or for dinner i may have been planning on making an actual three-course meal, and there i am at maggios picking up a pesto primavera. i'm addicted to pizza. and why should i stop? i love it.

for all of the struggling musicians

"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out" -Decca Recording Company, rejecting the Beatles, in 1962

This morning I got up early and went to Snow Summit to pick up a Christmas gift to me from the company. It was a ham and a bottle of wine! I felt very corporate receiving such a gift and it made me laugh. But I certainly won't complain, tonight we will be having a lovely dinner and it will make the holidays last a little longer. Afterward I grabbed a quick cup of coffee and headed to my new job. That's right friends, I have a new job! Although I'll still be teaching skiing and snowboarding on Saturdays (so you all can still be hooked up with lift tickets) , Monday-Friday I am working at DOVES domestic violence shelter. I just started this job and so far I really like it. For the first time, in quite a long time, I feel like I am headed in the direction that I want to be going and I'm making a bit of a difference. When I got here this morning I found out that one of our domestic violence counselors resigned and her position is now open. I really want that job. For now I am the shelter secretary. It's a silly title, really, because I do just about everything there is to do here. But the DV counselor job is exactly what I want to do. I would work at the outreach center office and counsel domestic violence victims and their families on a daily basis. These would be people that do not live in our shelter but are locals needing help. If I'm going to pursue becoming a therapist and put time and money into grad school, then I definately need this experience. After all, what if I hate it? Then I can go in a different direction before I spend a lot of time in this field. I can run away and become a writer. Anyway, I'm giving you way more information then you want to know. I basically just wanted to ask that you guys would pray for me. I get a buzz just thinking about getting the job, so I would appreciate your prayers. Thanks!-a

Also, why don't you bums come to Big Bear more? We miss our friends and we've been coming down to the rough city quite a bit lately. So it's your turn!

arbitrarily weighing up

i'm always way behind with this kind of shit, but i just happened upon an album entitled "howl" by the black rebel motercycle club and it's pretty damn inspiring. i had an old record of theirs that wasn't much to speak of however this new one is worth some typing. i recommend it.

on the first of january, some close friends of ours move to nashville for a few months to make a record. so tonight we will join them in saying farewell and good luck at the lava lounge in l.a. i'm prepared to put a few away if need be. an example of successful marital compromise is this: she gets to spend money on a new shirt. i get to spend money on new beer.

i was talking to brandon vedder on the phone yesterday, when i was interrupted by a scene that transpired before my eyes. i stopped one sentence, and began verbally unfolding what it was i was watching. when finished brandon asked me if i was even aware of what i had just said, and added that it was a perfect example of where and how i live. he also stated that it would be genius in a script. so now that i've built it up when it's really nothing, what i said was,
"i just saw my mechanic drive by in my wifes volkswagen with his dog riding shotgun after he asked us four days ago to borrow it for one day to go feed his moms cat."

i've grown aware as of late that i am a big fat advantage taker. give me something to take advantage of and i'll swipe it from your mits before you even knew i was there. not to proud, maybe that's something to remedy with the new year.

and with that by the way, happy new year. may your celebrations be blessed and safe.

ten

in 1990 i was ten years old. for christmas that year i wanted the lab tech jr. chemistry set, i wanted the he-man vs. skeletor castle grey skull, and i wanted rock'em sock'em robots. i got the lab tech jr. and ended up lighting my sock on fire and burning my eyes. i didn't get castle grey skull, but seth allen did. from that day on we weren't best friends anymore. and i got rock'em sock'em robots, and couldn't be beat.

when you were ten what were three things you wanted?

a tribute to greatness

who am i:

i'm tall. i drink loads of alcohol. ten years ago i bought my first car, which i still drive. i go to vegas bi-weekly and call matt at four in the morning every time to sing him "sweet child of mine". i call cigarettes dugans. in the fourth grade i rapped, i made up stories about a girl who was six hundred feet tall and wide and came from the amazon eating turkey, i had an ape drape for hair, and if you mock it i wouldn't even hesitate to tear off your arm and jam it in and around your eyes. i'm fantastic.

hint: my name starts with b and ends with unky.

today i didn't even have to use my A K

i gotta say it was a good day. two reasons largely responsible are as follows:

reason #1. to my suprise i have just come across my long lost "21 singles" from the jesus and mary chain, including such tracks as head on, just like honey, and sometimes always. pure genius in its simplest form. this gives me a happy feeling deep down inside my loins. and what the hell does that even mean? i've got a dictionary in the drawer, lets take a peek.

loin \'loin\n 1: part of the body on each side of the spine between the hip and the lower ribs. 2: pl: pubic regions

reason #2. we just booked a february residency at the detroit bar. this as well gives me a good feeling in my pubic region. not literally, but this is very exciting nonetheless. so if your in the area, and you like to listen to live music and drink beer, come. steve d. will be joining us with a banjo... no shit.

owen matthew pool

our nephew was born last night. his name is owen matthew pool (matthew, after his uncle matt). he is perfect, you guys. i wish you could have seen him. he is tiny, only a little over six pounds. his skin is perfect and he looks like a little elf. the family went down to the hospital in redlands yesterday afternoon and he was born in the evening. andrea did great and had a wonderful labor and delivery. only josh was in the room with her, so it was very special for them. andrea got to hold the baby right away and josh got to clean him. it was a beautiful night. being there and apart of his birth, and also of esme's birth almost exactly two years ago, has been one the most amazing experiences of my life.
we'll post pictures soon!-a

masterpieces

Alexandre Gustave Eiffel: The Eiffel Tower
Frank Lloyd Wright: Fallingwater
Charles and Ray Eames: 901 Washington Boulevard
Minoru Yamasaki: The World Trade Center
Walt Disney: The Swiss Family Robinson Tree House
John Steinbeck: East of Eden
Miles Davis: Kind of Blue
Charles M. Schulz: Linus
Bill Watterson: Scientific Progress goes "Boink"
Theodor Seuss Geisel: The Butter Battle Book
Wes Anderson: The Royal Tenenbaums
Steven Spielberg: E.T.
Levi Strauss: The 501
Tacobell: The Carmel Apple Empenada

please opine further.

just a taste

the other night after free drinks in chinatown, i ended up in some designer's 10th floor loft with steve, derek, and luke. it was a friendly little gathering; the kind with crack in the bathroom and sex on the dancefloor. i had a few wine's and some smoke, and tried to dance a bit when i was reminded of the reason why i don't much care for los angeles. i was surrounded by plastic people trying so hard to be seen, however when you do make eye contact with one you get snubbed. people who've spent days planning which leg warmers would go better with which high heels, and which sunglasses they could wear inside, at night, and still see the numbers on their phones. here i was in a place where people were waiting in line outside to get in, and i was bored. these weren't my people. but don't get me wrong, it was like a movie, and i had fun with my friends, whom i love. a few dialogues that stuck with me however were:

me: no way, it's the girl from that keith urban video.
derek: crazy, where?
me: right behind me.
derek: crazy. who's keith urban?

it's a good thing derek doesn't know who keith urban is, i wish i didn't.
later:

luke: you just got your picture taken by the cobra snake.
me: your lying, where?
luke: right there by the fire escape.
me: no way. who's the cobra snake?

later:

steve: matt i just had the craziest idea. (if you know steve this is funny already)
me: what is it?
steve: let's take the ladders up to the roof.
me: nice, lets.

which we did, where we were told to get down by a shaq sized black man. immediately after, steve got stuck in an elevator with 17 other people for an hour. thats all.

top five guilty pleasures

1. eating shortbread products
2. watching kcet antique specials on tv
3. smoking tabacco products
4. pretending to play fleetwood mac songs on piano in my car
5. sleeping in during church

name yours

in response to mr. talbot

matt's elph 607
Originally uploaded by mattamberpool.

contents of 1 gola bag:

1 canon digital elph camera
1 soft camera case
1 old relevant magazine issue
1 old spin magazing issue
1 holiday lego catalog
1 pair vonzipper sunglasses
1 cellular telephone
1 edition of the grapes of wrath
1 box bud light playing cards
1 jameson whiskey flask
1 red journal
1 unanswered letter
1 box colored pencils
1 art journal
1 burton beanie
1 set billy bob teeth
1 egg shaker
1 bic lighter
and a bunch of pencils

joshua tree

joshua tree
Originally uploaded by mattamberpool.

had a good ol' fashioned camping trip up in joshua tree national park with tim and shauna. did some rock climbing. told scary stories. got really excited about our "poor mans dinner" and ended up burning it to an un-edible crisp. good times. who wants to go camping soon? say when and pick a spot.

for my 1/2

buried in your blankets left for dead
my heart beating in my head
i lie still pretending i'm asleep
and i watch you put your clothes on for me
the local pharmacist and his wife
and i'm convinced after your performance
that this world is too small for us
and our stupid instincts
and our stupid desires